Tag Archives: New Mexico

Put a bird on it.

Posted on February 7, 2012 | 2 Comments

Hi. How you doing? Good I hope. Well tonight I’m gonna tell you a little story about my week.

Sooooo this week ( it’s only Tuesday night!!!)  has been super stressful with no thanks to PMS. Monday night I was in tears multiple times and I felt like Patrick Bateman during the business card scene.

I felt like this…image

 

And I wanted to do this…image

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All over some trivial ass bullshit ( if you are just joining us,  I frequently shit where I eat and make bad decisions). Fuuuuuuu. Combine that with sewing and thinking about stupid shit and last night was pretty terrible.

Cut to about about an hour ago tonight and I get home from rehearsal. I live in a house with an alarm system. I roll up after stopping at the grocery store and notice a big red light is flashing. Oh that must be for the alarm…. I got to the front door and it’s ajar. Oh shit. And like a dumbass, I open the door and say “ Hello? Anybody there?” Well that was stupid. (Why don’t I just drop my panties and make it easier for the rapist*. ) So I call my room-mate and ask if they left in a hurry yadda yadda yadda.  They come home, and for whatever reason the door didn’t close when they left. Oh. Needless to say, I just got out of a nice long and hot Epsom salt bath and I’m  on my second drink of Ginger Ale and Jim Beam.

 

SOooooo with all that said, please come out and see me and all the amazing performers coming your way to tease and entertain you Thursday February 9th and Friday the 10th and  Saturday the 11th during the 6th Annual Southwest Burlesque Showcase.

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A lot of blood, sweat, tears and glitter go into producing, costuming, choreographing, stage managing &  titty-taping in order to bring such an amazing festival to Albuquerque. Many many thanks to everyone involved!!

<3<3<3 XOXOXOXOX<3<3<3

Please say thank you, buy them drinks and give massages with happy endings. I would like all of the above please!!! xoxox

 

*I’m actually more afraid of being shot than raped. I just don’t want to get raped by an ugly dude.*

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Posted in burlesque, Burlesque Noir

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Better Living Through Bad Decisions

Posted on December 31, 2011 | Leave a comment

I sit here writing this on my newly awakened laptop ( it died in September) , eating Red Velvet Cake Pancake Puppies with Cream Cheese Icing from Denny’s. Life is good I tells ya!

The death knell for 2011 hasn’t even rung yet and 2012 is looking pretty dope. Not that 2011 wasn’t amazing. It was. I got to go to new cities and meet new amazing people. I had the best freaking birthday ever and I spent the holidays with my true family of friends.Oh I also feel in love…….with whiskey. 2011 has also given me a goal. A goal for 2012 and beyond. That goal: Make more bad decisions.

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It’s time to start living ladies and gents and make better bad decisions. Let this motto carry you through 2012 and beyond. See ya in jail bitches!

UPCOMING EVENTS

  • Catch me January 18th at the Launchpad where Vagrant Variety presents another panty-dropping good time with music by Diverje, stand-up comedy, poetry, and burlesque. Only $5!
  • Southwest Burlesque Showcase. Catch me solo Friday  February 10th at the Kimo,  and catch me with Burlesque Noir Saturday night. I’ll be cheering and running around topless Thursday night at the Launchpad as well. 377990_299077033458842_145708085462405_934848_514010756_nCheck out Burque Burlesque for the complete line-up!

Be safe and happy tonight my loves! XOXOXOXOXOXOX

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Posted in burlesque, Burlesque Noir

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Burlesque Hangover

Posted on April 29, 2011 | Leave a comment

Wednesday night’s show with Trixie Little and the Evil Hate Monkey was one of the most exciting and weird and fantastic shows I have ever done. It was such an honor to share the stage with two of my most favorite performers. To see what they do and to see how the 505 crowd loved them was beyond amazing. I can’t thank them enough! I am also blown away by how amazing the New Mexico burlesque scene is. On a Wednesday night there was a large crowd, cheering, drinking and having a blast! Thank you audience!! And I can’t forget the amazing NM talent that graced the stage. Let me thumb through a thesaurus and just list all the synonyms for fantastic because that’s what they are: A-1, awesome, best, best ever, cat’s meow, delicious, far out, first-class, first-rate, great, like wow, marvelous, out of sight, out of this world, primo, sensational, superb, unreal!!

 

Also, I just found out that I got accepted to perform at the Colorado Burlesque festival. Not only will I be performing with Burlesque Noir but I will also be bringing my Mary Jane solo up to the Mile High City. I’m pretty stoked. So I get to join the ranks of Holly Rebelle, Kitty Irreverent, Tallulah St. James, Zircus Erotique, and Vivian Mirann. New Mexico is at least in every show representing and probably gonna tear a new asshole in Colorado. Stay tuned for more details!

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Posted in burlesque, Burlesque Noir

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Posted on January 16, 2011 | Leave a comment

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FUCK! Have I got some exciting news for you!

Burlesque Noir has been accepted to perform at the Windy City Burlesque Festival.  OMG!  Yes Miss Honey we get to hang out with Michelle L’Amour again. AHH! 

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We are hoping we can get a fundraiser going soon so we can buy our plane tickets because for some odd reason, flights to Chi-Town are fucking expensive.  I may have to sell a kidney. I’m really excited to get a Chicago style hot dog. I love hot dogs.

Also, the Tini’s and Teaser’s show at Low Spirits was amazing. The show went over capacity. And I got to say, I my new solo was smoking hot. Look at how hot I am.

thehotnessIf you missed this you are on my shit list and I am going to find you and sit on your face and fart the Russian National Anthem. Seriously. You are dumb for missing me perform. DON’T EVER DO IT AGAIN!!!!

Oh and we are going to perform at Rock the Ink in March as well. Can you say “busy beavers”?

 

Remember to check out BN at the 5th Annual Southwest Burlesque Showcase. The lovely Ann Gora will be performing Friday night and Mr. and Mrs. Rebelle along with BN will be performing Saturday. UNF!

2011, you are kicking some serious ass!

(Photo of my hotness is due to the awesome that is Alex Fullam of Dark Flash Photography)

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Posted in burlesque, Burlesque Noir, news

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Colorado Burlesque Festival

Posted on July 15, 2010 | Leave a comment

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The program for the weekend. Oh yeah check out that line-up!!!

First off, can I just say how THRILLED I am to be apart of an amazing group of girls who decide to get naked in front of a crowd of thousands? Because I am. I am apart of the amazing group Burlesque Noir and without them I would not have had the BEST WEEKEND EVER!

Ok, now to a long narration of the trip. I was having too much fun to take pictures. Deal with it.

So I fly out Saturday morning. Get to the airport and there is a looooooong line for security. Whatevs, breeze right through.  Quick hour long flight to Denver and then I am wondering around Denver airport just trying to leave. I swear I thought I would never get out of there. Anyways finally made it out and got picked up by Holly Rebelle and her husband.   So, we make it to our hotel, The Curtis, and it is one awesome hotel. I stayed on the thirteenth floor and it had a horror theme. The elevator doors open, and you hear Jack Nicolson’s voice, the doors open and there is a picture of “Here’s Johnny” from the Shining. Yeah. Awesome.

GEDC0057Lounging around until we go to tech at the Gothic Theater. 

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What’s up clear shower?

We  go to have a tech rehearsal at the Gothic Theatre. I love the Gothic Theatre. It’s so nice performing at a place that has professional sound and tech people. Love it.

I ATE CHIPOTLE!!!!

After tech we head to the Aerial Dance Over Denver space to attend a workshop with Michelle L’amour and Trixie Little and Evil Hate Monkey.  Holy crap Michelle’s workshop was so intense and soooo much fun. She is funny and amazing to work with.

Michelle L'Amour workshop

Trixie and Monkey’s workshop was a fantastic exercise in improv and just having a fantastic time. 

Now time to perform at the first ever Colorado Burlesque Festival!!

backstage

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Thanks for the great pics Broken Glass Photography!

 

We got to watch the entire first act since we opened the second act. Amazing. Highlight, Trixie and Evil Hate Monkey’s Total Eclipse of the Heart piece. I was soo moved. And Tigger! I love me some Tigger!

We totally rocked TD-36DD. I would walk through the audience and people would just come up to me and tell me how awesome the piece was. YES!

The rest of the second act blew me away. Peggy Tulane is adorable. Trixie and Monkey’s piece had the best us of a fog machine. Michelle L’Amour’s Sally Rand Fan Dance brought me to tears because it was so magical, graceful and all around damn good!

Oh and Liam Sullivan mced as Kelly.

OMG SHOES Afterparty at Jonsey’s Eat Bar who were nice enough to donate food and booze backstage and stay open past last call for us naked drunks!

After Party with Trixie Little and Evil Hate MonkeyAfter Party with Michelle L'Amour

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These pics taken by Kate Levy and I got them from :http://www.westword.com/slideshow/backstage-at-the-colorado-burlesque-festival-30321624/1 which has a huge slideshow of photos from the Colorado Burlesque Festival.

After we got kicked out of Jonsey’s, there was an after after party in Tigger!’s room 504. I can’t post those photos due to the heavy nudity, booze and Effiel Towering.

We all partied until 5:30 in the morning, and I ended up standing outside out hotel in nothing but underwear and sneakers. I had been up for 24 hours and needed to get some rest before check out and the 7 hour drive back to Albuquerque.

The drive back was pretty hilarious. There was puke, blood, Human Centipede jokes,delirium, and Secret Diary of a Call Girl. Yup. Car full of hot mess.

So I’m slowly coming back down from that amazing high. For a festival that was put on for the first time, the organizers did an amazing job. Thank you so much for your hard work and fantastic asses: Lola Spitfire, Fannie Spankings, Honey Touche, Midnight Martini, Liam Sullivan, Jonesy’s Eat Bar, Tigger!, Trixie Little and Evil Hate Monkey, Michelle L’Amour, The Gothic Theatre staff, the awesome burlesque fans in Denver, Burlesque Noir, Wynkoop, Pandora  Jewelry, Starshine, Pampered Passions, the amazing performers & Delicia Dollcurls for the photos!

Oh yeah, performers got goodie bags!GEDC0067

Goodie bags with BEER!

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Posted in Burlesque Noir, hot mess, travel

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OMG

Posted on May 13, 2010 | 2 Comments

omg

I have something pretty awesome to share. Are you sitting down? I can wait while you pull up a chair. You good. Cool. Ok here it is: I HAVE A JOB AT A PLACE THAT I LIKE AND IT IS A COOL JOB!!!!!!!! WTF right? Are you dreaming? Am I dreaming?   I’m working at a bead shop. I get paid to look at shiny things and make jewelry. Fuck yes!

Funny story about work today.  I was looking for pictures of “june bug clip art” using MSN Bing and porn was coming up in the results. The boss was in the room too. Awesome.

Anyway, I have other exciting news. Burlesque Noir is going to be performing at the Colorado Burlesque Festival.  And since I have a job and I asked nicely, I will be going to that motherfucking festival.

Speaking of Burlesque Noir, don’t forget about our upcoming show June 9th at Low Spirits. Tickets are still on sale for the low low price of $8. Don’t be a whiny bitch. Come see Duke City Dames Meet Luscious Liberty Ladies!

Alright! Until next time, stay hood my niggaz!

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Posted in Albuquerque New Mexico, burlesque, Burlesque Noir, Denver Colorado

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News!

Posted on April 26, 2010 | Leave a comment

So I am alive. Here’s what’s been going down so far this month. I finally got a temp job. It could be ending soon. Whatevs. I got some money. With that money, I finally got some Sugarpill makeup. Oh how I loves it. Seriously, go to the website and buy as much as you can. I can’t wait to order some more. I’m looking at you Bulletproof,  Midori and those lashes.     Here are two shitty webcam pics of me wearing Love + (red)  and Poison Plum (purple). Picture 233 Picture 232

 

I also got myself a tattoo. Fuck yeah Fight Club tattoo! You envy my awesomeness bitch! GEDC0007

I also bought a cheap digi camera to take that picture since I broke my other camera at my friends wedding. Note to self: don’t clap with a camera. Especially when wearing rings.

OHHH Paul is actually going to start paying me to help out at his shows. I will be videotaping and packing up his stuff. FUCK YEAH MAGICIAN’S ASSISTANT!!!

Burlesque Noir is gearing up for our awesome NY v.s. NM show on June 9th. We will be having  five lovely performers from the great state of New York fighting to the death performing with us and other Duke City lovelies. It’s gonna rock the house. I am working on an extra groovy solo. You can purchase tickets now for $8!. Do it soon because this show is going to sell the fuck out and you do not want to miss me it!

Till then my lovelies!

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Posted in burlesque, Burlesque Noir, news, tomfoolery

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It’s Dan Aykroyd Day!

Posted on March 12, 2010 | Leave a comment

So. Dan Aykroyd was in town yesterday selling his own Crystal Head Vodka. At a Walgreens. Enjoy the photos.DSC04969

The line when we got there around 3:30pm.

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$44.99 + tax bottle of vodka purchased. It’s filtered through diamonds.

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So close. We are so excited, so excited, so scared. Before we knew he was coming to town, Paul and I had been holding a mini Dan Aykroyd marathon. It was a sign.

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Omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg!

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OMG OMG OMG OMG OMGOMG OMG OMG OMG IT’S MOTHERFUCKING DAN AYKROYD!!!!!!!!

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Crap pics I know. But, I shook his hand. It was very soft and warm. Like fresh dough. Fresh awesome “ I was in Ghostbusters” dough. Mmmmmmmm.

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Signed vodka.  Signed Trading Places DVD. BOOYAH!

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Hi. Did you hear that Sara met Dan Aykroyd. Yeah. You go girl.

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:) This expensive liquor is now residing on our bookshelf in the living room. It will be admired and remind me of that great day.

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Posted in tomfoolery, wtf

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Upcoming!

Posted on February 1, 2010 | Leave a comment

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The 4th Annual Southwest Burlesque Showcase is happing in a few days!!! New Mexico’s own Burlesque Noir, September Smith, Riri Syncyr, Scarlet Grace, Kitty Irreverent & Vivian Mirann will be performing. Check and click the flyer for more info.  Burlesque Noir will be performing Friday night.

 

Also, Burlesque Noir is gearing up to go to Boston again (!) for the Great Boston Burlesque Expo. BAM! THEY HAVE WORKSHOPS OMFG!

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Getting Started with Hooping

Posted on January 6, 2010 | Leave a comment

It’s a new year. Time for a new you? New exercise routine? New skill to impress your friends and family with? How about hooping? Great! Here are some things to help you get started.

Firstly, you need a hoop. Not any old Wal-Mart hoop. You need something like this:

 

(afraid/constipated look not included)

 

The hoops used are bigger, heavier and more sturdy. The bigger the hoop, the slower it moves and it is easier to keep up.

Ok Sara! I do want a hoop. Where do I get one? Well, I got the orange and black single closure travel hoop  from www.troohoops.com.  It’s nice and heavy and they use cloth tape for extra grip. Oh hai, you can click on this pretty gif. and go to their website.

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Or you can check out: www.hoopnotica.com, www.hooprevolution.com, or www.hoopgirl.com, and Hula Hoop Sassy (Choose Your Color)

There are a bunch of other hoop sellers out there so Google away and find what you like! www.hooping.org has a list of sellers, performers, businesses, and anything else hoop related.

OR you can make your own. I’ve made myself a couple basic ones. Go to :http://www.jasonunbound.com/hoops.html for the breakdown. DIY for life yo!

It’s easy and fun and customizable.

If you are lucky resident of Albuquerque, we have a hooper who makes and sells customizable hoops:http://www.etsy.com/shop/alaskaj

You can find examples of her work at the Magic and Juggling Shop and at Birdland costume shop.

 

Alright! I got my hoop. Now what should I do? I want to learn the basics and some nifty tricks. Groovy! I bought this book with dvd : Hooping: A Revolutionary Fitness Program (Book & DVD) by Cristabel Zamor. It’s a great book with detailed pictures and breakdown of the moves. There is also accompanying stories of how hooping changed Cristabel’s life and others through the joy of hooping.  And seriously, a book and dvd for $10.85 ain’t that bad. You’d be crazy to pass this up.

Also check out : The Hoop Dance Workout by Cristabel Zamor and Hoopnotica Hoopdance Beginning Level 1 by Rayna McInturf & Keaton Talmadge. (Just a note, haven’t looked at these dvd’s yet. I’m sure they kick major booty.)

But you don’t need to buy a dvd or book at all. You can find your local hoop jam and hang out there and learn alot from those in the know. 505 resident, come out to Bataan Park every Sunday from 11 am till whenever for a hoop jam. There are tons of hoops and lots of space. It’s a great way to spend your Sunday.

Got some space in your house? Throw on your favorite tunes and go crazy. Just hoop around and have fun and get lost in the amazing feeling. You’d be surprised at the amount of sweat you build up!

Other sites to check out : www.hoopcity.ca, www.hooping.tribe.net,  www.hooplovers.com, www.dukecityfix.com/group/albuquerquehoopers, and  www.youtube.com for lots of hooping tutorials.

Have I included enough links in this post?

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Posted in hoopdance, hooping, links

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